The therapy for regrets

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The therapy for regrets

Life as we know it comes with all kinds of actions, reactions, re-reactions and so forth. At the core of it all is the ineluctable, insuperable fact that we humans are at best pawns in a grand  scheme of events which we cannot always control. But, yes, we are indeed bequeathed with some control. An amount that spares us the regard of robots or minions.

The fair amount of control we possess empowers us with a large dominion over the affairs of our lives. Never the total we so crave, for in the process of living is the interplay of life forms which occurs because of sheer inevitability but especially because it is part of the grand design of life. So you are in control of your life .But well, not really. This is a statement that transcends us and those before us. The power to choose is perhaps the most important form of Will we possess.

Choices are indeed what guide us through our lives. But what guides us through these choices? Vicissitudes and whatnot.  Instincts.  External forces.  The divine.  And most especially situations. The ones we are not in total control of. But these choices have to be made. It is not a choice to make these choices, no. It is a function of the living for only the living can make choices.

Choices beget sequences of life events. And as time passes these choices we made determine how our lives play out. Whether we look back in hindsight and maunder regretfully or guffaw in satisfaction. But should we lay blame on ourselves for our regrets? Should we in fact retrospectively say we made mistakes when some of the life choices we made led us to quandaries? Should we always ponder to ourselves: I could have done better, I should have waited longer, I should not have done this.

In all fairness, not always. As much as present choices lead us through paths into the future, we are, as I stated earlier, hardly in control of the choices we get. The best choices do not always pan out good. But they were probably the best choices at the time we made them. They were perhaps the only choices we had. Why then the endless regrets? Why the excessive brooding over the past? Yes, we probably could not have done better. And that is a truism that we can always choose to accept.

 

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